My view on religion.

Truth is nothing when belief is everything

The first time I encountered religion was in primary school.. grade 2 I believe. The school was separating us into different groups for scripture classes, and naturally they wanted to segregate us into groups based on our beliefs. We were all given a piece of paper with a list of choices of religions to choose from.

Now, consider that I had never even HEARD of religion before up till this point.. and that this seemed almost like a test, I was quite uneasy and lost. Looking at the list, my eyes scanned over the choices, and I ticked the box next to the name that seemed the easiest to say. Catholic.

And so I quite cluelessly began attending catholic scripture classes for the next few years, and I was remarkably one of the most diligent students in the classes. I began to thoroughly believe in god, and I found myself often blaming him for not doing my homework for me. I'd pray before dinner, I'd pray before I sleep. I liked god, although he was pretty shy in my eyes. One day he'd probably have enough confidence in himself to appear before me, and considering how much I prayed to him, I felt I deserved it. He was never more than a dream to me though.

When primary school was over, I began attending a high school which did not encourage any such religious classes. A majority of my highschool years were completely devoid of any religious influences, and by the time I graduated, I had all but developed a solid view of religion that would stay up with me to the current day. That view being :

Religion brings hope.
Religion brings unity.
Religion brings conflict.
Religion brings violence.
Religion brings death.

Religion has taught me that in this wonderful world, truth is nothing when belief is everything.

I guess it might be the way I look.. or the way I act? But to most who know me, it's well known fact that I attract evangelists like moths to a flame. Religious friends took me to church so often in an effort to rekindle my religious flame, that some eventually considered me a full christian, even though I still didn't believe in the Bible. But they offered free lunch.. so hey, I sing, I get to eat. I can live with that.

I attended church camps (in one particular church I argued with a pastor for hours on end about the legitimacy of the Bible) , sang proudly in church hymns, went to Bible study nights and participated tearfully and truthfully in confessions. I attended korean churches, chinese churches and english churches, and probably knew more verses than some of the devoted. I can quite confidently say I also lived more of a 'christian' life than many of my counterparts.

Yet, after all this, I cannot believe in Him. I have no reason to, when my father has done more for me than He could ever do. I believe in balance, I believe in nature, and I believe that if there is a God, 'He' is our world. In everything we do, everyone we meet; the way we live is our interaction with this natural god.

For more info on my philosophies click here.